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Why Is Saying “Thank You” So Hard?

Giving thanks is not just for God’s glory—it’s for our good.
By Lauren Chandler


Let them thank the Lord for his steadfast love, for his wondrous works to the children of man! Let them extol him in the congregation of the people, and praise him in the assembly of the elders. (Psalm 107:31-32)

“Did you say, ‘thank you’?”

Momma’s hand pressed my shoulder, turning me toward the woman standing with us. I turned my face up and momentarily met eyes with her, “Thank you.”

She smiled, “You’re welcome!”

I returned the smile and pulled the new doll tightly into my chest.

Why is saying “thank you” so hard for us?

Especially as children, it is a lesson learned, not often a natural response. The older we get and the more we understand the value of things, it becomes easier. But if you’re like me, when it comes to the Lord, I can forget to give thanks.

This is bad news. Forgetting to thank the Lord is forgetting His will for my life. As Christians, we spend our lives wanting to know, “What is God’s will for my life?” We buy books, ask friends and pastors, and take tests designed to help us discover His will for us in particular.

Let me help you: “Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you” (1 Thessalonians 5:16-18).

Ta-da!! You’re welcome.

What is God’s will for you? Rejoice, pray, and give thanks. When? Always, without ceasing, and in all circumstances.

We can always rejoice in God’s goodness and steadfast love toward us. Joy is a fruit of the Spirit and thus is not dependent upon certain conditions. It is rooted in the imperishable, unchanging, and unconditional. As long as we have the Spirit, we can have eyes to see the Lord’s goodness in the land of the living (Psalm 27:13). And in seeing, we can rejoice.

Prayer sharpens our sight. It puts prescriptive lenses on our spiritual eyes. An open line of communication with the Lord allows us to “cry out” in our distress and short-sightedness and to hear and see His response.

When I am consciously aware of God’s presence and am in conversation with Him all throughout the day, inconveniences become opportunities, disappointments become an occasion to trust the Lord’s sovereignty, hurts become a chance to extend forgiveness extended to me through Christ, fears are overcome by His love for me as His child, and happiness overflows into praise.

It’s not easy, and it’s for sure not natural, but it is essential to the next part of His will for my life: to give thanks in all circumstances.

Lauren Chandler talks honestly on FamilyLife Today® about the chains that often bind us and reflects on her own chains of a disordered desire and the steps she took to find freedom. And walk with Lauren as she shares what she has learned about God's love in her book, Steadfast Love.


Excerpted with permission from Steadfast Love: The Response of God to the Cries of Our Heart by Lauren Chandler. Copyright © 2016, B&H Publishing Group.



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