I’m passionate about my marriage. There’s nothing I wouldn’t do to protect it. Recently, this meant renting a car and driving to the Philadelphia airport by myself.
It all started when my husband, Bob, and I were trying to think of how to thank Suzy for 10 years of ministry partnership at Secret Keeper Girl. A Caribbean cruise seemed to be just the thing, so we bought tickets for Suzy and her husband, Jonathan. Of course, we thought we should tag along, so we got two tickets for ourselves.
In the week leading up to our departure date, some challenges arose and Bob had to join Suzy and the rest of our Secret Keeper Girl team in Chattanooga the day before our vacation. That meant Jonathan and I would be departing from our hometown on our own.
I guess some women would feel comfortable taking a four-hour drive to the airport with a trusted male friend. I didn’t. And it’s because of something that happened in a hotel room in California almost 20 years before I was born.
One afternoon in 1948, a young Billy Graham invited a few friends—George Beverly Shea, Cliff Barrows, and Grady Wilson—to his hotel room in the city of Modesto. In that room, the four men decided (among other things) that to protect their marriages they would never be alone in a room or travel alone in a vehicle with any woman other than their own individual wives.
The commitments they made to each other became known as the Modesto Manifesto. From that day on, according to Graham, “I did not travel, meet, or eat alone with a woman other than my wife.” One of the great hallmarks of his lifelong ministry is that it was scandal free. What a gift of faithfulness he gave to his precious wife, Ruth.
Bob and I heard about the practical way this man lived out his passion for his marriage when our own marriage was brand new. We decided to follow his example. We don’t follow it because we are speakers. We made the decision when we were in our 20s and working as marketing consultants with no dream of writing books, speaking, and traveling.
Our verbal commitment to one another is something like this:
- We don’t go out to eat alone with someone of the opposite sex.
- We don’t get in a car or room alone with someone of the opposite sex.
- We copy one another when emailing someone of the opposite sex with personal information.
Through the years we have had friends, board members, business partners, and complete strangers question our decision. But we’re sticking to it.
My vacation cost me $211.15 more than I’d planned for one simple reason: My marriage is priceless to me.
Copyright © 2014 by Dannah Gresh. All rights reserved. This article originally appeared on MomLife Today®, FamilyLife’s blog for moms.
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1. Life online can be a trap for emotional adultery, or at least a marital drift toward isolation. Read “Avoid being a social media casualty” from the Stepping Up men’s blog.
2. How far will you go to stand by your vows? Kim and Krickitt Carpenter were the inspiration for the movie The Vow. Hear the true story of their commitment on FamilyLife Today®.
3. Whether you need a tune-up or a complete overhaul, consider investing in your marriage by going on a Weekend to Remember® marriage getaway.