Introducing Others Rule # 2
Rule:The most important rule of making introductions is to make the effort even if you can’t remember the names. Reason:To ignore trying to introduce people makes everyone feel awkward. Neglecting to introduce people is worse than breaking a rule while making the effort. Application:Introduce your child to your adult friends. Let your child see how easy it is to make introductions. Share a present, that is, a friend’s name with another. Copyright 2003, June Hines Moore Click here for a biblical approach and resources on manners.
Introducing Others Rule # 1
Rule:All children should learn how to introduce people, one to the other. Reason:Teaching your child to make introductions gives him or her confidence, new friendships, and the opportunity to make a good impression. Application:To teach your child how to make introductions, get him or her excited by inviting a friend over for a role-playing activity. Let the children wear hats to designate who they are. For instance, one child can wear a ball cap and the other child can wear a referee’s cap. The player wearing the ball cap will be introduced to the referee. Copyright 2003, June Hines Moore Click here for a biblical approach and resources on manners.
Writing Thank-You Notes Rule # 33
Rule:Always sign your first and last name on any correspondence unless you are writing a family member or close relative. Reason:Your name may not be common, but you don’t want the intended recipient to ponder and wonder which Alissa or which Reed you are. Application:Out of courtesy and for clarity, sign Alissa Haggerty or Reed Alverson. Copyright 2003, June Hines Moore Click here for a biblical approach and resources on manners.
Writing Thank-You Notes Rule # 32
Rule:The rule for signing greeting cards such as Christmas cards offers a choice. Whose name is listed first when the card is from the family or from a couple? Reason:Over the years etiquette experts have held different opinions. Some say the person signing for the family or couple lists his or her name first to signify the one preparing the card. Others say, out of humility, the signer lists his or her name last. Application:Sending the card with the proper sentiment is the important thing. You may sign a card: Mary and Bill Alders or Bill and Mary Alders. Copyright 2003, June Hines Moore Click here for a biblical approach and resources on manners.
Writing Thank-You Notes Rule # 31
Rule:In writing a thank-you note or letter don’t mention anything negative. Reason:Your hosts may have gone to a lot of trouble to bake a batch of peanut brittle for you at Christmas time. Even though they should have asked if you liked that type candy before presenting it, their feelings will be hurt unnecessarily if you say, “Thank you for the candy, but I’m allergic to peanuts and had to throw it out.” Application:Write an appropriate, but truthful thank-you note saying, “Thank you so much for the peanut brittle. Unfortunately, I am allergic to peanuts, but our entire office enjoyed eating it.” They send their thanks. Copyright 2003, June Hines Moore Click here for a biblical approach and resources on manners.
Writing Thank-You Notes Rule # 30
Rule:A widow retains her husband’s first name for life. Reason:The husband’s name is retained to show her status of widowhood. Application:Even after Mr. Lelus Reed is deceased, his widow is and always will be Mrs. Lelus Reed. Copyright 2003, June Hines Moore Click here for a biblical approach and resources on manners.
Writing Thank-You Notes Rule # 29
Rule:A divorced woman’s title may be Ms. or Mrs. with her first and last names. Reason:These designations more clearly identify her marital status because her first name is used instead of her former husband’s name. Application:When writing a woman who is divorced, write Ms. Jane Abbott or Mrs. Jane Abbott. If Jane is married, her name is correctly written Mrs. Carl Abbott. Copyright 2003, June Hines Moore Click here for a biblical approach and resources on manners.
Writing Thank-You Notes Rule # 28
Rule:The title Ms. is used before a woman’s name when her marital status is unknown and for any woman in business. Reason:Often we do not know the marital status of a woman we are writing; therefore, Ms. is a most efficient way of addressing a woman when you are unsure of her marital statue. Also, in business, her marital status is of no significance. Application:Use Ms. with her first and last name. Ms. Jane Abbott is correct. Copyright 2003, June Hines Moore Click here for a biblical approach and resources on manners.
Writing Thank-You Notes Rule # 27
Rule:On the first line of an address on an envelope, there is only one time when it is proper to put two names on one line is Mr. and Mrs. John Evans. Reason:They are a married couple, not simply two people living at the same address. Application:When you address something to two unmarried people living at the same address, their names are not connected with “and” on the first line; rather, they are listed with one name on the first line and the other name listed on the second line. Example:
Miss Joan Adams
Miss Anne Adams Copyright 2003, June Hines Moore Click here for a biblical approach and resources on manners.
Writing Thank-You Notes Rule # 26
Rule:A woman is addressed as “Miss” from birth. Upon marriage she is known as “Mrs.” before her husband’s name (Mrs. Harry Gibbs). If a woman never marries she usually adopts the title “Ms.” to replace “Miss” after she is about twenty-five, unless she prefers to retain “Miss”. Reason: Application: Copyright 2003, June Hines Moore Click here for a biblical approach and resources on manners.
Writing Thank-You Notes Rule # 25
Rule:A young man is addressed as “Master” until he is about seven years old. From seven until eighteen, he is addressed without a title. After that, he is addressed as “Mr.” Reason:The rule is an old one distinguishing among age. Application:Let your children see you address something to a young man under seven. You will write Master Joey Wilson. You will write Mr. Joe Wilson for Joey’s dad. Copyright 2003, June Hines Moore Click here for a biblical approach and resources on manners.
Writing Thank-You Notes Rule # 24
Rule:On any correspondence, everyone likes to have his or her name listed and spelled correctly. Names are better left unabbreviated or written with initials except for junior which can be written Jr. Reason:A person’s name is his or her identity and distinguishes one individual from another, even within families. Application:If you are a junior, the second, or the third, sign your name this way: Thomas Allen Bowers Jr. (or Junior); Thomas Allen Bowers II; or Thomas Allen Bowers III. (Nephews are named II, while a son is named Junior. Therefore, Thomas Allen Bowers II is named for an uncle.) Note: The comma normally used before “Jr.” has been dropped in this modern age of computers. Copyright 2003, June Hines Moore Click here for a biblical approach and resources on manners.
Writing Thank-You Notes Rule # 23
Rule:When an invitation has RSVP, you must answer with yes or no. Reason:The letters stand for Répondez, s’il vous plait and they mean “Answer, please.” Application:If the sender lists a telephone number, you may call to give your answer.
If the invitation says (Regrets only) you reply only if you cannot attend; otherwise, the hosts expect you to be there. If the invitation simply has RSVP, that means you are to write your answer, either on your own stationery or on the enclosed response card. Copyright 2003, June Hines Moore Click here for a biblical approach and resources on manners.
Writing Thank-You Notes Rule # 22
Rule:No matter how formal or informal, an invitation should be acknowledged within one week of receiving it. Reason:The person issuing the invitation must make plans that may involve far more arrangements than the receiver knows. Application:Within one week, if possible, let the host know for sure if you are coming. Your answer must not be maybe or perhaps but yes or no. You should abide by your decision unless there is a death in the family or you become ill. Copyright 2003, June Hines Moore Click here for a biblical approach and resources on manners.
Writing Thank-You Notes Rule # 21
Rule:With sympathy or condolence messages, it is better to leave out expressions such as “Time heals all wounds” or “He is so much better off.” Reason:Such expressions are of little or no comfort to the grieving loved one. Application:It’s better to say, “I am so sorry for your loss” instead of “I know just how you feel.” Copyright 2003, June Hines Moore Click here for a biblical approach and resources on manners.
Writing Thank-You Notes Rule # 20
Rule:Letters of condolence or sympathy are better written on plain white or gray paper and often more appreciated than a commercially purchased card. Reason:It shows respect for the deceased and the loved ones remaining. Application:Simply express how sorry you are about the loss of the loved one (or pet, or loss of anything). Say some good things you remember about the person. For instance, “I loved his sense of humor. Remember the time we went fishing with him and got lost. His funny stories kept us from being afraid until we found our way.” Finally, give a specific offer of help, if possible, rather than “Let me know if I can do anything.” Copyright 2003, June Hines Moore Click here for a biblical approach and resources on manners.
Writing Thank-You Notes Rule # 19
Rule:Never begin a note or a letter with an apology. Reason:It sets a negative tone for the entire piece of correspondence, no matter what is said later. Application:Begin the written message with positive words, such as “It was so nice to see you last week. I hope we can talk again soon; however, I regret that I cannot come to your party next week. It sounds like a lot of fun.” Copyright 2003, June Hines Moore Click here for a biblical approach and resources on manners.
Writing Thank-You Notes Rule # 18
Rule:For monogrammed stationery, the man’s initials are placed straight across. A married woman’s stationery has the first letter for her given name, with the second letter for her married name, and the last letter is for her maiden name. The middle letter is larger than the other two. Reason:The rule exists to distinguish between the two – male and married female. Application:For a married lady’s monogram, choose J M H. (Her married name begins with “M”.) For a male’s initials choose H L M. (His last name begins with “M”.) For children choose first, middle, and last name initials straight across. Copyright 2003, June Hines Moore Click here for a biblical approach and resources on manners.
Writing Thank-You Notes Rule # 17
Rule:When sheets of stationery are used, they are folded once and put in the envelope by placing the open edges in first. Reason:Such placement of the paper in the envelope makes for easier reading when the paper is pulled from the envelope. Application:Hold the envelope with the open flap facing you. Put the open edges of the folded paper in first so that when the paper is removed from the envelope and opened, the reader unfolds the paper and easily reads Dear…. Copyright 2003, June Hines Moore Click here for a biblical approach and resources on manners.
Writing Thank-You Notes Rule # 16
Rule:A note for such needs as an expression of thanks, appreciation, or sympathy should always be handwritten. Only business correspondence should be typed or computer generated. Reason:Technology brings new wonders to us almost daily, but a handwritten note or letter has a personal touch that no machine can duplicate. Application:If you need to write a note or letter and your handwriting is barely legible, you may want to print and use lots of space for easier reading. Crowded script is a chore to read. Copyright 2003, June Hines Moore Click here for a biblical approach and resources on manners.
Writing Thank-You Notes Rule # 15
Rule:When addressing an envelope, use the proper title before or after the recipient’s name. Do not put two titles for one name on an envelope. Reason:Courtesy and good taste dictates it. Application:Use Mr., Mrs., Ms., Miss, and Dr. as the most common titles used. If you are writing a medical doctor, write Dr. Sam Bowers or Sam Bowers, M.D. Never use two titles for one person’s name. Note: Dr. and Mrs. Sam Bowers is correct. (Two individuals, two titles.) Dr. Joel Sampson, M.D. is incorrect. Copyright 2003, June Hines Moore Click here for a biblical approach and resources on manners.
Writing Thank-You Notes Rule # 14
Rule:Only positive, complimentary words should be written in a note or letter. Reason:Written correspondence can be kept, reread, pasted in a scrapbook, and treasured in many other ways. You never know who may read the note once it is written. Application:Ask your child if he or she would like for you to read the note before mailing it to make sure it is written clearly and appropriately. Copyright 2003, June Hines Moore Click here for a biblical approach and resources on manners.
Writing Thank-You Notes Rule # 13
Rule:The ink used for an informal note may be the writer’s preference, but for serious writing, only black or blue ink is appropriate. Reason:Blue or black ink on white, off-white, or gray paper is the most distinguished choice of ink color for most adult handwriting. Application:Encourage your children to put their personality into their notes. Green ink may be the favorite. Stamp pads and stickers may make the task more fun to do. Copyright 2003, June Hines Moore Click here for a biblical approach and resources on manners.
Writing Thank-You Notes Rule # 12
Rule:The envelope for a social note should be properly addressed to accompany the thank-you note you have written. Reason:Your child will no doubt be addressing envelopes throughout life. Application:In the top left corner of the face of the envelope, write your street address on one line with the city, state, and zip code on the second line. In the center of the envelope write the full name of the recipient on the first line, the street address (with the apartment, if any), and the city, state, and zip code on the third line. At one time it was proper to indent each line of the recipient’s address, but technology has changed that rule of etiquette because it is difficult for the post office equipment to scan lines that are not aligned on the left. A stamp of sufficient postage is affixed in the top right hand corner. It should be straight with the face of the stamp properly aligned, not upside down. Copyright 2003, June Hines Moore Click here for a biblical approach and resources on manners.
Writing Thank-You Notes Rule # 11
Rule:A fold over thank-you note has these characteristics: a greeting, an expression of thanks, mention of the gift or special favor, an appropriate closing, a signature, and the date in the bottom left hand corner. Reason:These elements tell the recipient everything he or she needs to know. Application:Show your child one of the thank-you notes you have written, how you wrote Dear…, how you mentioned the gift, how much you liked it, and how you plan to use it. Then point to the closing such as Sincerely, Love, or Fondly followed by your signature below, with the day of the week in the bottom left corner. (For informal notes, the complete date is not necessary.) You may also write the date in the top right corner. Copyright 2003, June Hines Moore Click here for a biblical approach and resources on manners.
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