Signs That an Adolescent May Be Struggling with Gender Issues
Don Schmierer
None of these are clear-cut indications of homosexual tendencies. However, if several of them are evident, the young person may be struggling with gender issues.
- A sensitive child being forced to feel different because of mocking or downgrading by peers or family
- A young boy who hangs out with girls exclusively; history of playing with girls instead of boys prior to puberty
- Effeminate behavior/appearance in boys or extreme macho behavior; mannish style and “butch” posturing in girls (not to be confused with simply being athletic)
- Unnatural friendship that is compulsive, secretive, or inseparable developing between siblings, cousins, relatives, or neighbors—especially in merged families or foster families
- Exaggerated rejection by same sex parent
- Fatherless home or emotionally unavailable father
- Dominant mother
- Youngest male child
- Young girls with much older female “best friend” in a relationship that excludes others of the girl’s own age
- Anger—often manifested in sarcasm, cynicism, or withdrawal
- Frail, deformed, deaf, or otherwise “outcast”; physical appearance not socially acceptable; “slow”
- Comments, “I must be gay,” or “I guess I’m bisexual.”
- Loner, preoccupied with self
- Boys may avoid fights/physical altercations
Printed with permission from An Ounce of Prevention by Don Schmierer. Date: 11/13/2007 12:00:00 AM
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