How long has it been since your marriage ended? How did it end (i.e. who filed for divorce, was it mutual, etc.)?
What would you say were the things that led to your divorce? Have you taken time to prayerfully examine your part in that?
What can you tell me about how you got to this current point in your life? Can we unpack that journey together?
At this point in your life are you committed to following God’s will no matter what?
Have you given reconciliation with your former spouse a chance? What did that process involve?
Beyond talking to me about this, what steps have you taken to resolve your issues? Have you sought the help of a pastor or Christian counselor?
What do you believe God wants for your children in all of this?
What have you learned about yourself from your divorce?
What problems are you still having with your ex-spouse that need to be resolved? Have the two of you at least moved back to a friendship level?
What has been the most difficult part of being divorced? What has that looked like on a daily basis for you and how can I pray for you in that area?
Do you pray for your former spouse?
Is your desire now to remarry? Have you taken time to examine your motives for wanting that at this time?
Remarriage is often more difficult than a first marriage. What counsel have you received about the issues you will face once remarried?
How can I be an encouragement to you right now?
If you could sit down with your former spouse and have a healthy, honest discussion about what went wrong, and seek forgiveness and healing, what would you say to them? Do you think God could ever arrange for that discussion to occur?
Do you have any ongoing regrets about the past that maybe we can prayerfully discuss together?
What would give God the most glory in your life now? What can you do to take a step in that direction?
If you are considering remarriage, what do you believe will be different this time around?
What have you learned about yourself from your past marriage (e.g. about your needs, feelings, goals, the way you handle stress, the way you handle another person’s anger)?
Without beating yourself up or causing unhealthy condemnation, what have you learned about how the kids (if you have kids) have been negatively affected by your divorce? What steps are you taking to help them recover from that?
Have you had time to recover emotionally from your failed marriage? Has there been a process of repentance and forgiveness? Tell me more about that.
Can I ask you if you’ve ever really given complete control of this part of your life over to God and His Lordship? Would you like help doing that?
I believe the most important relationship a person has in life is the one they have with Jesus Christ. Can you tell me a little about what that means to you?