Tell me about you and your spouse. How did you meet, why did you decide to marry, what were the early years like?
How has your spouse changed over the years of your marriage? How have you changed? What discoveries have you made?
When did you first notice that you and/or your spouse were struggling in the marriage? What was that like? What seemed to trigger that change?
What attempts have you as a couple made to improve things? What have you done to improve yourself as a marriage partner? What have been the results of those efforts?
How did your spouse go about leaving? Did your spouse leave your home or did you ask him/her to leave? Did you leave or did your spouse ask you to leave?
Is this the first time you and your spouse have separated? If not tell me about the other separations: when, how long, why, etc.
If you separated and reunited in the past, what brought you back together? Do you think this time is different? Why?
What do you think would need to happen to bring you and your spouse to the point of at least working toward reconciliation?
Are you willing to commit to a plan to forgive your spouse and allow God to heal you?
If your spouse refuses to return to your marriage, are you willing to trust God to meet all your needs—financial, physical, emotional and spiritual? I realize this is easier said than done, but are you at least willing to trust Him?
What do you believe God can do if you let Him have complete control of your life? What keeps you from taking that step?
Have you made every effort to listen to and understand your spouse? Do you see anything more that you can do to encourage your spouse to reunite with you?
What can you tell me about the current state of your marriage? Is there any sign of hope for a future?
What are the important turning points that have led to the current state of your marriage? Tell me about the approach you took during those critical times.
I believe the most important relationship in your life is the one you have with God through Jesus Christ. How do you feel about that statement? How would you describe your relationship with Jesus Christ?
What is one step you can take in the right direction and how can I help you do that?