"Some of us ask too much of marriage. We want to get the largest portion of our life's fulfillment from our relationship with our spouse. That's asking too much. Yes, without a doubt there should be moments of happiness, meaning, and a general sense of fulfillment. But my wife can't be God, and I was created with a spirit that craves God. Anything less than God, and I'll feel an ache."

“When marriage is filled with more withdrawals than deposits, it’s easy to forget why you married in the first place … The same love that drew us to our mates so that we wanted to spend our lives with them is still there. It may be covered over with the trauma of irritations and the loss of romance, but it’s there nevertheless.”

“There are two parts to handling the problem of a withdrawn man. The first is to commit yourself to the process of helping him emerge into his God-given role, and the second is to build for yourself a strong relationship with the Lord from which to draw strength while the emerging process is working.”

“I often hear many wives complain that their husbands are too disconnected and passive on family matters. But why is he passive? Quite likely in the past, every time he tried to step up to the plate, she had a better idea. After a while, he just let her have her way.”

“If you are in a marriage where your husband is disinterested in sex or unable to be interested, you must guard your heart, your eyes, and your activities.”

“It is as important to be filled with the Spirit in bed with your husband, ministering to him, as it is for you to be filled with the Spirit when you are teaching the Bible or ministering.”

“An expert in sexual issues made the following statement: ‘Ninety percent of sexual problems aren’t sexual at all—they have their roots in the emotional barriers we place between ourselves and our partners. We bring these problems into the bedroom from the dinner table, the office, and our past experiences.’ The reasons why a man may lack sexual interest include changing sex roles, fear of closeness, feeling overworked and overstressed, time pressures, boredom, marital conflict, anger, and fear of sexual dysfunction.”

“While it can be difficult to start, couples who have worked at openly talking about their fears and expectations around sex find not only a richer love life, but a deeper, more trusting marriage.”

"Contempt is born when we fixate on our spouse's weaknesses. Every spouse has these sore points. If you want to find them, without a doubt you will. If you want to obsess about them, they'll grow--but you won't!"

“God is very concerned about your marriage, including your sexual relationship. Fall on your knees before Him, pour out your heart, your hurt to Him. Ask Him to show you how to love your husband, how to affirm him, how to encourage him in his masculinity. Ask God specifically if there is anything you can do to create desire in your man.”

“Don’t let negative emotions like resentment, bitterness, self-pity, and unforgiveness build up in you. Keep yourself healthy and attractive. If you don’t think highly enough of yourself to take care of your body, do it as an act of kindness for him.”

“Sometimes there is the opposite situation, where the wife is sexually neglected by her husband. His lack of interest can happen for many reasons—physical, mental, or emotional. But if he is content to go month after month without sex, then something is wrong. If there is no physical problem hindering him, maybe he’s having deep feelings of failure, disappointment, depression, or hopelessness that need to be addressed. Prayer can help reveal what the problem is and how to solve it. Get professional help if you need to. It’s cheaper than a divorce of the physical, emotional and mental ravages of a dead marriage.”

“When a wife believes there is a problem, when she feels hurt, lonely, or neglected, she definitely has no interest in responding sexually. When her spirit is crushed, her body is unavailable.”

“Whatever the reason, a man who refuses to address his low libido and meet his wife’s needs is putting his marriage at great risk. If you are wrestling with this issue, and if talking with your wife about it is too difficult, seek help. Find a pastor, counselor, or another godly man in whom you can confide. Do it for the sake of your marriage and family. Step out of the shadows of isolation and into the healing from the One who gives ‘every good and perfect gift’.”

“There may be a number of causes for a man’s lack of interest in sexual relations with his wife: childhood sexual abuse, guilt or shame over past sexual sin, significant rejection in his life, which makes the risk of any potential rejection by you frightening, workaholism, exhaustion, health issues and prescription medications he may be taking, fear of his potential ability to perform sexually, pornography, and masturbation.”