Session 4.2

Session 4: Building Relationships

Children are a gift from the Lord; they are a reward from him. Children born to a young man are like arrows in a warrior’s hands. How joyful is the man whose quiver is full of them!

Psalm 127:3-5

For the love.

Loving our kids unconditionally can be one of the best ways for them to envision God loving them unconditionally.

But if showing them love isn’t saying a constant “yes” or handing them expensive gifts—what does it look like?

Take Aim Questions

Take some time to journal and process the questions below, they’ll help you apply parenting principles that will set you up for success.

It’s important to know what “fills your child’s tank.” Describe what fills the tank of each of your kids and how you can use that to deepen your relationship with them.

Are you ever guilty of “rules without relationship”?

Phil Visher said that our goal is not to have happy children but healthy ones. What do you think he means by “healthy” children?

What do you see as the main benefits to giving experiences to your kids rather than material items?

What does your family do for fun together?

The Need To Know

They want to know what love is.

  •   Fathers, in particular—because they may not naturally play as many nurturing roles—may need to make special efforts to verbalize and demonstrate sacrificial love.
  •   Relentlessly discover individual ways each child feels connected to you. Pursue your child’s heart.
  •   What are you tempted to choose as priority instead of your kids’ hearts?
  •   Your kids don’t need a friend in you as much as they need a parent and authority figure.
  •   We avoid being the bad guy because we buy into the cultural myth that we need to make our kids happy. Aim for healthy, and happy will often result. (Aim for happy, and you may lose both.)