31 Year Old Note to Self: Change Yourself
On our 31st wedding anniversary I wondered what I would say to my younger self about marriage. I realized I probably wasted 15 years thinking more about my wife's behavior than mine. But things got better for us when I looked in the mirror and measured myself by Christ's example of love. By focusing on me, I was able to change the only person I was able to change. When I did, it softly invited her to do the same and in changing ourselves we made far more progress than trying to change the other.
Show Notes
About the Host
About the Guest
-
On our 31st wedding anniversary I wondered what I would say to my younger self about marriage. I realized I probably wasted 15 years thinking more about my wife's behavior than mine. But things got better for us when I looked in the mirror and measured myself by Christ's example of love. By focusing on me, I was able to change the only person I was able to change. When I did, it softly invited her to do the same and in changing ourselves we made far more progress than trying to change the other.
-
Ron Deal
Ron L. Deal is one of the most widely read and viewed experts on blended families in the country. He is Director of FamilyLife Blended® for FamilyLife®, founder of Smart Stepfamilies™, and the author and Consulting Editor of the Smart Stepfamily Series of books including the bestselling Building Love Together in Blended Families: The 5 Love Languages® and Becoming Stepfamily Smart (with Dr. Gary Chapman), The Smart Stepfamily: 7 Steps to a Healthy Family, and Preparing to Blend. Ron is a licensed marriage and family therapist, popular conference speaker, and host of the FamilyLife Blended podcast. He and his wife, Nan, have three sons and live in Little Rock, Arkansas. Learn more at FamilyLife.com/blended.
-
What would you say to your younger self?
Ron: What would you say to your younger self?
Announcer: For FamilyLife Blended®, here’s Ron Deal.
Ron: On our 31st wedding anniversary I wondered what I would say to my younger self about marriage. Here’s one thing I came up with. “Ron, don’t spend so much time trying to change Nan.” I probably wasted 15 years or more thinking more about her behavior than mine. But things really got better for us when I started looking in the mirror and measuring myself by Christ’s example of love.
By focusing on me, I was able to change the only person I was able to change. And here’s the cool thing: when I did, it softly invited her to do the same. And in changing ourselves we made far more progress than trying to change the other. For FamilyLife Blended I’m Ron Deal.
Announcer: Find more at familylifeblended.com.
FamilyLife Blended with Ron Deal is a production of FamilyLife.
We are so happy to provide these transcripts to you. However, there is a cost to produce them for our website. If you’ve benefited from the broadcast transcripts, would you consider donating today to help defray the costs?
Visit http://www.familylifeblended.com/donate.
Copyright © 2021 FamilyLife. All rights reserved.
