My husband, Perry, and I were married last year and went on a monthlong road trip to visit family within our first two months of marriage. It’s OK to call us crazy; we kind of were.
I didn’t think through some conversation starters or what we would talk about on our long car ride up the east coast, but I wish I had. I don’t mind silence; actually, I prefer it at times. But I’ve had to learn that road trips are great opportunities for meaningful conversations (and for Perry, it’s been a learning curve of balancing long conversations—his preference—with moments of silence!).
Conversation starters for married couples
In the season of life we’re currently in—where we spend most of our time together—on a road trip of any length, we could benefit from some conversation starters.
Here are 10 road trip conversation starters for married couples to bring laughter and a deeper connection to your marriage. Take turns asking each other the questions below.
1. What was your first impression of me?
No matter how long you’ve been married, it can be fun to reminisce on this. There may be things you forgot about from when you and your spouse first met. This conversation starter isn’t your opportunity to tear your spouse down; instead, use it as an opportunity to build them up.
Perry’s and my first impressions of one another were different. It took me longer to know I had an interest in him. But if we were to talk about it today, we’d couple our first impressions of one another with the things we’ve seen in each other’s character since getting married.
2. What is the top item on your bucket list and why?
Whether it’s an item on your bucket list that you’d do individually or with your spouse, it can be telling of what dreams/aspirations you and your spouse have. Who knows, maybe it’s something you can check off together!
3. What’s a food you don’t like, but wish you did?
This question is meant to spark laughter and curiosity while getting to know one another better, even if you’ve been married a while. And there’s some science showing your taste buds change every seven years!
4. What’s a podcast you enjoy and why?
On car rides, there doesn’t have to be continual conversation. For Perry and I, this is very true.
If you’re both willing, each of you can pick a podcast you find interesting and listen to it together. It could be a funny podcast or a deeper one about marriage. Some questions you may ask after it’s over:
- What stuck out to you?
- What made you choose that podcast?
- If the topic is marriage related, how do you think this could impact our marriage?
5. What songs would you put on our couples playlist?
Following the podcast idea, another meaningful conversation starter for married couples is having each spouse make a playlist of 10 songs that feel significant to your marriage right now. This could spark further conversations about the deeper parts of your heart and offer an opportunity for your spouse to feel seen and heard. It could also be used to connect on an intimate level with your spouse.
6. Do you have a dream vacation spot?
Let’s be dreamers for a minute. Think and discuss a dream vacation spot you and your spouse have. It could be Paris, Italy, or Iceland … we’re just dreaming!
7. What hopes do you have for your family or future family?
You may already have a family, having conversations about a future family, having trouble starting a family, or you may not want to have children. Every couple’s story is different.
This is an opportunity to talk through your hopes for your current family, or think through your future family if you haven’t recently done so. Access your empathy as you see your spouse’s heart on the topic. Perry and I have had multiple road trip conversations on this topic and some of them have been our most raw and honest talks together.
8. What’s the biggest area you’ve seen me grow or change since we married?
We grow and change often in marriage. It’s the natural progression of life. As humans, we grow continually. Marriage is continuing to know who your spouse is and who they are becoming.
9. What is one thing you’re currently scared about and one thing you’re excited about?
This question can reveal a little of what is deeper in your heart. Be vulnerable. It could be present-day things you’re scared/excited about or future things, like, family, moving, finances, etc. The motive behind this conversation starter isn’t to jump into fix-it mode, but to meet your spouse in their fear and their excitement.
10. If you didn’t have to work for a living, what would you do instead?
This is a fun question that may reveal more passions in you and your spouse. You may learn something new about them. This conversation also has the potential to see God open your eyes to other job opportunities. Who knows what He may do in this space?
Making the road trip memorable
Life is too short to only sit in silence, make your road trips memorable through these meaningful conversation starters for married couples. Through good conversations, you might learn new things about yourself, your spouse, and God in the process!
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Brooke Wilson is a content writer and editor for FamilyLife at Cru’s World Headquarters in Orlando. She is newly married to her husband, Perry, and they have a Chocolate Labrador named Willow. Originally from Syracuse, New York, Brooke moved to Florida to pursue writing and editing content full time. A few of her favorite things are photography, running, and sipping a warm chai latte across from a friend.