Are You an Owner of the House or a Houseguest?
When people of many ethnicities gather in social situations the privilege class feels comfortable as "owners of the house" while minorities often feel like guests. But what's best for everyone is for minorities to feel like "owners," too. The same principle is true in stepfamilies. Unless the stepparent invites the biological parent to become a full-fledged member of the parenting team, they're just a guest and unless extended family members welcome each other, they stay divided.
Show Notes
About the Guest
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When people of many ethnicities gather in social situations the privilege class feels comfortable as "owners of the house" while minorities often feel like guests. But what's best for everyone is for minorities to feel like "owners," too. The same principle is true in stepfamilies. Unless the stepparent invites the biological parent to become a full-fledged member of the parenting team, they're just a guest and unless extended family members welcome each other, they stay divided.
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Ron Deal
Ron L. Deal is one of the most widely read and viewed experts on blended families in the country. He is Director of FamilyLife Blended® for FamilyLife®, founder of Smart Stepfamilies™, and the author and Consulting Editor of the Smart Stepfamily Series of books including the bestselling Building Love Together in Blended Families: The 5 Love Languages® and Becoming Stepfamily Smart (with Dr. Gary Chapman), The Smart Stepfamily: 7 Steps to a Healthy Family, and ...more
Are you an owner of your house or just a houseguest?
Are You an Owner of the House or a Houseguest?
Ron: Are you an owner of your house or just a houseguest?
Announcer: For FamilyLife Blended®, here’s Ron Deal.
Ron: When people of many ethnicities come together in social situations the privilege class feels comfortable as “owners of the house,” you know, they feel free to move the furniture and put their feet up on the coffee table. Minorities often feel like guests in the home. They would be hesitant to be critical of how the house was decorated. But what’s best for everyone is for minorities to feel like “owners,” too.
The same principle is true in stepfamilies. Unless the stepparent is invited by the biological parent to become a full-fledged member of the parenting team, they’re just a guest. And unless extended family members welcome each other, they stay divided. Hey, let them know, “You can put your feet up.” For FamilyLife Blended I’m Ron Deal.
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