FamilyLife Blended® Minute

Step Down Expectations

with Ron Deal | March 16, 2023
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“Why won't my son ask his stepfather for help with his math?” one mom asked me. This mom wanted her son to feel comfortable with Tim, so she kept pressuring them to get along. But pressure often backfires. One key step for stepfamilies is to step down your expectations. No, you don't give up. Just realize that family integration takes years and pressure doesn't help. Accept and appreciate relationships as they are today makes for a more relaxed home which, ironically, helps people become family.

  • Show Notes

  • About the Host

  • About the Guest

  • “Why won't my son ask his stepfather for help with his math?” one mom asked me. This mom wanted her son to feel comfortable with Tim, so she kept pressuring them to get along. But pressure often backfires. One key step for stepfamilies is to step down your expectations. No, you don't give up. Just realize that family integration takes years and pressure doesn't help. Accept and appreciate relationships as they are today makes for a more relaxed home which, ironically, helps people become family.

  • Ron Deal

    Ron L. Deal is one of the most widely read and viewed experts on blended families in the country. He is Director of FamilyLife Blended® for FamilyLife®, founder of Smart Stepfamilies™, and the author and Consulting Editor of the Smart Stepfamily Series of books including the bestselling Building Love Together in Blended Families: The 5 Love Languages® and Becoming Stepfamily Smart (with Dr. Gary Chapman), The Smart Stepfamily: 7 Steps to a Healthy Family, and Preparing to Blend. Ron is a licensed marriage and family therapist, popular conference speaker, and host of the FamilyLife Blended podcast. He and his wife, Nan, have three sons and live in Little Rock, Arkansas. Learn more at FamilyLife.com/blended.

Ok, stepfamilies. It’s time to step down…your expectations, I mean.

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Step Down Expectations

With Ron Deal
|
March 16, 2023
| Download Transcript PDF

Ron: Ok, stepfamilies. It’s time to step down…your expectations, I mean.

Announcer: For FamilyLife Blended®, here’s Ron Deal.

Ron: “Why won’t my son ask his stepfather for help with his math?” one mom asked me. You see, this mom just wanted her son to feel comfortable with Tim, so she kept pressuring them to get along. But pressure often backfires.

You see, one of the key steps for stepfamilies is to step down your expectations. No, you’re not giving up. Just realize that family integration, as I like to call it, takes time. Many years for most families and pressure doesn’t help. Accepting and appreciating relationships as they are today makes for a more relaxed home. That, ironically, helps people become family. For FamilyLife Blended I’m Ron Deal.

Announcer: To find out more visit familylifeblended.com.

FamilyLife Blended with Ron Deal is a production of FamilyLife®.

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