FamilyLife Blended® Minute

The No Threat Message

with Ron Deal | April 8, 2022
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The answer to this question is important because a child who thinks you’re trying to take their parent’s place will likely work hard to prevent you from doing so. So, just tell them and tell the biological parent, too. A stepmom might say to the Mom: “I want you to know, that I know, you’re the mom, not me. My job is to bless your kids, not get in the way.” Doing this lowers the child’s and the parent’s sense of threat and their need to oppose the stepparent. It invites cooperation.

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  • The answer to this question is important because a child who thinks you’re trying to take their parent’s place will likely work hard to prevent you from doing so. So, just tell them and tell the biological parent, too. A stepmom might say to the Mom: “I want you to know, that I know, you’re the mom, not me. My job is to bless your kids, not get in the way.” Doing this lowers the child’s and the parent’s sense of threat and their need to oppose the stepparent. It invites cooperation.

How do you let stepchildren know you’re not trying to take their parent’s place?

The No Threat Message

With Ron Deal
|
April 08, 2022
| Download Transcript PDF

Ron: How do you let stepchildren know you’re not trying to take their parent’s place?

Announcer: For FamilyLife Blended®, here’s Ron Deal.

Ron: The answer to this question is important because a child who thinks you’re trying to take their parent’s place will likely work hard to prevent you from doing so. So, I say, just tell them. And while you’re at it, tell the biological parent, too.

A stepmom might say to the Mom: “I just want you to know, that I know, you’re the mom, not me. I will always respect that and I will speak well of you to your children. My job is to bless your kids, not get in the way.” Now see, doing this lowers the child’s and the parent’s sense of threat and their need to oppose the stepparent. It invites cooperation. For FamilyLife Blended®, I’m Ron Deal.

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