FamilyLife Today® Podcast

Love Renewed: Bob and Valerie Dovey

with | August 14, 2009
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Tune in today to hear Florida residents Bob and Valerie Dovey share how Christ changed their focus--and their lives, after attending a FamilyLife Marriage Conference.

  • Show Notes

  • About the Host

  • About the Guest

  • Tune in today to hear Florida residents Bob and Valerie Dovey share how Christ changed their focus--and their lives, after attending a FamilyLife Marriage Conference.

  • Dave and Ann Wilson

    Dave and Ann Wilson are hosts of FamilyLife Today®, FamilyLife’s nationally-syndicated radio program. Dave and Ann have been married for more than 38 years and have spent the last 33 teaching and mentoring couples and parents across the country. They have been featured speakers at FamilyLife’s Weekend to Remember® marriage getaway since 1993 and have also hosted their own marriage conferences across the country. Cofounders of Kensington Church—a national, multicampus church that hosts more than 14,000 visitors every weekend—the Wilsons are the creative force behind DVD teaching series Rock Your Marriage and The Survival Guide To Parenting, as well as authors of the recently released book Vertical Marriage (Zondervan, 2019). Dave is a graduate of the International School of Theology, where he received a Master of Divinity degree. A Ball State University Hall of Fame quarterback, Dave served the Detroit Lions as chaplain for 33 years. Ann attended the University of Kentucky. She has been active alongside Dave in ministry as a speaker, writer, small-group leader, and mentor to countless wives of professional athletes. The Wilsons live in the Detroit area. They have three grown sons, CJ, Austin, and Cody, three daughters-in-law, and a growing number of grandchildren.

Tune in today to hear Florida residents Bob and Valerie Dovey share how Christ changed their focus–and their lives, after attending a FamilyLife Marriage Conference.

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Love Renewed: Bob and Valerie Dovey

August 14, 2009
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Bob:  You had to wonder, "What's really going on here," didn't you?

Valerie:  Yes, I sure did.  And when he'd come back from Promise Keepers, he would be even more of a completely different person.

Dennis:  You know, not only has your marriage benefited from the FamilyLife Marriage Conference, but you all have now begun to reach out to others and invite friends and neighbors to attend?

Valerie:  Yes.

Bob Dovey:  Yes, we had never been to a conference, since the first, by ourselves.  We always have at least one more couple, and last year we took five or six couples, and this year it looks like we'll take even more.  Some of those couples came because – my wife is the big promoter – I am, too …

Dennis:  … now, wait a second.  Valerie is starting to promote these things?

Valerie:  Yes.

Dennis:  This is the non-religious Valerie who had to be drug to the first one?

Valerie:  That's right.

Dennis:  What happened ,Valerie?

Valerie:  Like I said, I didn't know what I was in for when we went the first time around, but once it was all over with and said and done, I enjoyed it so much that I couldn't wait to go back the next year.

Dennis:  And you guys have now been to four, getting ready to go to your fifth?

Valerie:  Yes.

Bob Dovey:  Right.

Bob:  Tell us how you go about deciding who you're going to invite and inviting them.  How do you do that?

Valerie:  I don't really think that there is a process.  I just kind of attack every married couple.

Bob:  I can't beat that answer.  All I can say is we do pay attention to those who look like they can use a hand up and that, and, you know we all have a story.  Ours may not be like theirs, but if we can tell our story, and we can get some people interested, because I don't care what they look like – remember when I was in politics.  I looked pretty good.  I was fairly successful, but inside in our relationship we were dying, and I lose people out there. 

So my wife's right.  She gets a hold of everybody and me, I press hardest for the ones that look like, you know, or the ones that I get to know well enough to know that this is something that can help them, too.

Dennis:  Well, give all of the listeners right now your challenge to attend this conference.  Why should they go?

Valerie:  Why should they go?  Well, I’m going to say this is the thing that I attack all the couples with is – I don't care how good of a marriage you think you might have, it can always be better.

Bob:  Yes, 'cause when you went to the first one, you told me it was a 6 or a 7 at that point, right?

Valerie:  Right.

Bob:  But once you looked at it a little harder, you saw where the holes were?

Valerie:  Yes.

Dennis:  And what is it now?

Valerie:  I would say it's more like a 9 or a 10.

Dennis:  Really?

Valerie:  Oh, yes.

Dennis:  He's changed that much?

Valerie:  Oh, yes, he has, and I'm looking forward to that figure going up.

Bob:  You know, we really didn't hear the story of how things finally solidified in your own heart and mind, Valerie, about a relationship with Christ.

Valerie:  Gosh, I don't even know how to explain that.  Something got a hold of me, kind of gave me that little, teeny bit of desire to have something that I didn't have before.

Bob:  Oftentimes, Dennis, in this kind of situation, where someone comes to faith in Christ, and you see a dramatic change – for the other person it may be a little more subtle or, over time, but just that transformed person around you, inch by inch, step by step, you move in the right direction.

Dennis:  You know, what I found interesting, as Bob and Valerie have shared here and, Bob, it was your prayers for Valerie, praying that for weeks in advance that your wife would come to faith in Christ at the conference, when the Lord twisted those prayers back on you and changed you to such a point where those date nights and your love for Valerie would end up being the springboard that would help her move into a relationship with Christ. 

And I think, many times, we may underestimate Christ working in our own life and how it's not us preaching, it's not us just praying for our spouses, but it's us applying God's word in our marriages, with us loving our spouses, that makes a huge difference in their lives and, Bob and Valerie, I want to thank you for sharing with us today just a little of your story.  You guys are tremendous, and I hope you keep attacking couples, Valerie …

Valerie:  … yes, sir…

Dennis:  … inviting them to the FamilyLife Marriage Conference.

Valerie:  I certainly will.

Bob:  You may want to call some folks today and through the weekend since this is your last opportunity that FamilyLife Today listeners have to register for an upcoming conference and if you register at the regular rate another couple can come as your guests absolutely free.  It’s a buy-one-get-one free opportunity but it’s only good through the weekend. 

We are hoping folks with go online at FamilyLife or call us at 1-800-FL-TODAY.  When you register as a couple at the regular rate you can bring another couple with you or you can send another couple.  If someone lives across the country and you want them to attend you register and attend in your city and the certificate can be sent to them and they can go in their city. 

It’s a buy-one-get one opportunity for FamilyLife Today listeners and it is only good through this weekend.  If you want to take advantage of this here is what you ought to do.  Go to our web site FamilyLife where you will find out all the information about the conference.  You can find out when it is coming to a city near where you live.  All the details are there.  You can register online if you like and if you do that you have to identify yourself as a FamilyLife Today listener.  You can do that when you fill out your registration form online by typing my name “Bob” in the promo code box. 

When the registration is complete you’ll be registered to attend and we will also send you a certificate for another couple to attend absolutely free. 

If it is easier just call 1-800-FL-TODAY.  That’s 1-800-358-6329.  Someone of our team can answer any questions you have and get you registered over the phone.  Mention on the phone that Bob sent me and they will make sure you get the certificate for the second couple to attend absolutely free as well.  

Let me also encourage you if you are on our web site FamilyLife we have the Weekend to Remember Marriage Conference on audio CD.  If for some reason you cannot attend the conference this fall but you’d still like to hear the messages you can order the complete CD series from us online at FamilyLife  Or you can call 1-800-FL-TODAY and ask about the FamilyLife Weekend to Remember on audio CD. 

I want to mention we heard recently from a listener who wrote and said,

“Two months ago I asked my husband to leave our home.  This is a couple who had been married for 20 years.  We’d been through counseling and we both wanted to try and preserve our marriage but it just was not working. 

This weekend away from the routine of life forced us to concentrate on our relationship.  When we wrote each other a love letter it reminded me of all the reasons God brought us together.  Now I’m looking forward to at least another 20 years together.  I’m renewed and refreshed.  Our marriage is better than ever.”

That’s what happens for a lot of couples at the Weekend to Remember Marriage Conference and if your marriage could use a little renewing or refreshing let me encourage you to go online and register for the upcoming Weekend to Remember Marriage Conference or call us at 1-800-FL-TODAY.

With that we need to wrap things up for today.  Thanks for joining us.  I hope you can be back with us on Monday when we will spend some time with Voddie Baucham.  We are going to hear about the kind of young man a young man needs to be before he comes to seek Voddie’s permission for his daughter’s hand in marriage.   That’s a subject of a new book that Voddie has written and I hope you can join us for the conversation on Monday.

I want to thank our engineer today, Keith Lynch, and our entire broadcast production team.  On behalf of our host, Dennis Rainey, I'm Bob Lepine.  Have a great weekend and we’ll see you Monday for another edition of FamilyLife Today.

FamilyLife Today is a production of FamilyLife of Little Rock, Arkansas. 

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