Married Sex: Questions Everyone's Asking

When it comes to sex…what’s normal? Sex therapist Dr. Michael Sytsma & Shaunti Feldhahn discuss research about drive, initiative, and other questions.

Could your sex life be missing the point? Dr. Michael Sytsma talks about why we have sex…and the key to wow-level sex that changes everything. View Show Notes →
Has your married sex coasted into the blahs? Sex therapist Dr. Michael Sytsma's got solutions to keep you both captivated in the bedroom. View Show Notes →
Sex can be painful in so many ways -- but it doesn't have to mean doom. Sex therapist Dr. Michael Sytsma offers way to transform hurt to eventual healing. View Show Notes →
Initiating or declining sex: It's tricky. Are your signals clear to your spouse? Sex therapist Dr. Michael Sytsma helps you with ";not tonight" and "yes, please." View Show Notes →
Wondering how to keep your married sex life sizzling -- or just move around conflict or hurt? Sex therapist Dr. Michael Sytsma helps you troubleshoot. View Show Notes →
Does one of you want more sex than the other? Sex therapist Dr. Michael Sytsma offers ideas and insight to work through differences in sexual desire. View Show Notes →
Does one of you want more sex than the other? Sex therapist Dr. Michael Sytsma offers ideas and insight to work through differences in sexual desire. View Show Notes →
When it comes to sex, what’s normal? Sex therapist Dr. Michael Sytsma and Shaunti Feldhahn discuss research about drive, initiative, and other questions. View Show Notes →

Meet Series Guests

Brian Goins

Brian and his wife Jen love building into families and eating great food together. They have three children who all want to move to Montana. Brian serves as Sr. Director Special Projects at FamilyLife. He is also the executive producer on an adolescent-focused documentary series called Brain, Heart, World (brainheartworld.org) aimed at helping change the conversation about pornography in our country and has written Playing Hurt: A Guy’s Strategy for a Winning Marriage.

Michael Sytsma

Michael is a pastor at heart with a clear gift in teaching. He is passionate about marriage and helping couples grow in their marriage. This passion is clearly evident as he engages a room full of couples in looking at their marriage with hope and increased confidence. His giftedness in teaching helps couples learn important truths about marriage in a fun and interesting way.

As a therapist, Michael is a compassionate pastor who is not afraid to encourage you to grow. He believes God gives each of us the strength we need to become all He desires us to become and to grow our marriage into the intimate union God designed. His workshops and seminars have touched many couples in the Southeast. He is a regular speaker at national AACC (American Association of Christian Counselors) and CAPS (Christian Association for Psychological Studies) conferences and to other Pastors, counselors and therapists to the Christian community.

Michael has been working with couples in a variety of capacities since 1987. He is a Licensed Professional Counselor in the state of Georgia, a Certified Sex Therapist, and a Certified Sexual Addictions Specialist (Trainer level). He is also an ordained minister with The Wesleyan Church and has served as a staff pastor for churches with attendance from 30 to over 1000. He is currently appointed to Building Intimate Marriages, Inc. by The Wesleyan Church. Michael received his BS in Christian Ministry from Indiana Wesleyan University, an MS in Community Counseling from Georgia State University, and a diploma in Christian counseling from Psychological Studies Institute. Michael also has a Ph.D. from the University of Georgia in Child and Family Development / Marriage and Family Therapy where he specialized in marital sexual therapy. His dissertation was on “Sexual Desire Discrepancy in Married Couples”. Michael has recently joined with 3 Christian sex therapists in founding Sexual Wholeness, Inc.

Michael and Karen have been married since 1985 and have two sons, Josiah and Caleb.

Shaunti Feldhahn

Shaunti received her graduate degree from Harvard University and was an analyst on Wall Street before unexpectedly becoming a social researcher, best-selling author and popular speaker. Today, she applies her analytical skills to investigating eye-opening, life-changing truths about relationships, both at home and in the workplace. Her groundbreaking research-based books, such as For Women Only, have sold more than 3 million copies in 25 languages and are widely read in homes, counseling centers and corporations worldwide.

In 2020, Shaunti, together with her husband Jeff Feldhahn, released Thriving in Love & Money. Little did they know just how timely this book would be as the world suddenly changed and couples needed to be able to talk about money more than ever. While most money books deal with surface issues of budgeting and debt, many couples struggle to even talk about money and it creates tension and a barrier to true oneness in their relationship. This is the money book that’s not about the money. It uncovers the issues that cause money conflicts and provide couples with truths that are relationship game-changers. Because you need a better relationship, not just a better budget. Find out more at thriveinloveandmoney.com.

Her book, The Kindness Challenge, continues to catalyze a much-needed movement of kindness across the country and beyond. Dozens of prominent organizations and leaders are coming together to do The 30-Day Kindness Challenge, and encourage their followers to do the same.

Shaunti’s findings are regularly featured in media as diverse as The Today Show and Focus on the Family, The New York Times and Cosmo. She (often with her husband, Jeff) speak at both live and on-line events in the U.S. and around the world. Shaunti and her husband Jeff live in Atlanta with their daughter and son, and two cats who think they are dogs.