About the Guest
Becket Cook
Born and raised in Dallas, Texas, Becket Cook moved to Los Angeles after college to pursue a career in writing and acting. He currently works as a production designer in the fashion world. He recently received his master’s degree from Talbot School of Theology at Biola University and spends much of his time in ministry, speaking on the issue of homosexuality at churches, universities, and conferences.
Episode Transcript
Bob: Yes.
Becket: Then God had so much grace on me. When I got saved, it kind of like slammed down to like 10 percent or less—5 percent. It’s something where, before I was a Christian, it dominated my thought life; it dominated kind of everything I did—sexuality did. Now, I rarely think about it.
I’m happy to be single and celibate, like Paul and Jesus; because it’s like I have eternal life! I have a relationship with the King of the universe. I have eternal life; I could live under a bridge for the rest of my life. I don’t care because I have this incredible relationship. I never feel cheated out of something. People always ask me: “Isn’t it unfair that you have to be single for the rest of your life? Isn’t it unfair that you can’t be in a relationship?” I’m like, “I’m in a relationship with the most amazing Man I’ve ever met! [Laughter]
Ann: I love you.
Becket: “What’s unfair is Jesus had to beaten, crucified, and killed because of my sin—that’s unfair! I’m like, “My life is like nothing but gravy now. I get to be with Jesus for the rest of my eternity!”
Bob: When you read the evangelical voices that are saying that same-sex attraction and following Jesus are compatible, and we’ve misunderstood the Bible all these years—
Becket: Look, the thing is—people, since day one, for millennia—have tried to justify sin in whatever way. Those people, who are saying that—that you can be engaged in homosexual behavior and be a Christian—they are/I mean, for lack of a better word, they are deceived; it’s a deception. It’s so incompatible with, not just like the six kind of “clobber” passages in the Bible that deal with it directly, but with the whole story of God’s—God created sex. He created sex to be expressed, within this covenant that is safe and secure, between one man and one woman. There is a reason He did that; He knows what’s good for us, and He knows how we flourish.
Whenever we go outside that covenant, it is destruction. It’s like unwanted pregnancies; it’s STD’s which, like for years, I was terrified of. I mean, praise God like I—there were so many times I could have gotten HIV, but I didn’t—God protected me from that. Not only just the diseases and the pregnancies, but also the emotional scarring of multiple partners and all that stuff—and being exposed to somebody, like spiritually, physically, emotionally, and then just being like cut off after one night or whatever/one year. That has major—it takes an emotional toll on a person.
We don’t even like talk about that or recognize that. I mean, we’re recognizing it in the Me Too movement. But it’s like: “Okay; there wouldn’t be a Me Too movement if we actually lived in God’s design for covenantal marriage; there would be no Me Too movement. There would be no diseases—there would be no STD’s—at all. That’s what is missing from the conversation.
Bob: You know, for us, this is at the heart of what we’re all about as a ministry—practical biblical help and hope around marriage and family, trying to help people think: “This relationship/these family relationships, our gender, our sexuality, how we interact with one another—first in the home, in a covenant of marriage, and then beyond that in the broader culture—this is God’s purpose for us in life—is to receive from Him the love He has for us and then to be gutters of that love into the lives of other people in a way that reflects the kind of love that He has.”
I’ve gone to preaching here, but it’s—what you’re illustrating with your life and with the passion that you’re expressing it is so close to the heart of what this ministry is all about—that to be able to share your story with our listeners is a real privilege. It really is.
Dave: Oh, yes.
Ann: And when I listen to you, Becket, I think, “You are a 100 percent in.” You didn’t say, “Jesus, have half of my life/have three-quarters of my life.” You were all in. I think that, even for all of us as listeners, too, when we give Him everything/when we step out on the water and we just say, “I’m Yours,” that’s when He really has a chance to work in our lives.
Becket: Yes; and the thing about obedience to God is it’s such a joy to be obedient—
Ann: Yes.
Becket: —because before, as I said, living in a post-modern world, you don’t know anything. You don’t know what’s good or bad. It’s like, when your parents give you boundaries, it’s loving; and it feels good as a child. Now that I understand the boundaries of life and of what God wants, I feel safe, and I feel loved by my Father. I have so much joy in obedience.
Dave: Oh, it’s obvious. You can—you exude it. [Laughter]
Ann: Yes; the Holy Spirit is like alive in you.
Dave: No kidding! Yes; I was thinking, you know it’s funny that you asked your counselor, “Why am I here?” He couldn’t answer.
Becket: Yes.
Dave: And you just told us, and your book tells the world and every listener—your story tells why you’re here. It’s one of the FamilyLife® and Cru® foundational statements: “To know Christ and to make Him known.”
Bob: Right.
Becket: Yes.
Dave: And you just—I mean, the passion of you talking about knowing Christ, and then you’re living your life in a way to make Him known everywhere you go, whether it’s on a set or on a radio broadcast—wherever you go—you’re going to make Christ known; that’s your purpose!
Becket: Yes.
Dave: And I hope every listener goes, “If I give Him everything, I’ll know why I’m here. He’s going to reveal it to me; and if I will step into it, He’s going to use it—
Becket: Yes; He will.
Dave: —“like He’s using you.”
Becket: He will.
Bob: You are writing and speaking. You’ve been to seminary. You got a master’s in Theology from Talbot Seminary—
Becket: Yes.
Bob: —and out speaking in places all across the country. We’re just grateful you stopped by here; grateful for the book. Thank you for the time this week.
Becket: Thank you guys. It was such a pleasure to be here.
Bob: Becket’s book is called A Change of Affection: A Gay Man’s Incredible Story of Redemption. You can get a copy. In fact, I’d encourage you to get a copy. It is such a great story of God’s redeeming work in Becket’s life and just reminds us of God’s grace. Again, the title of the book: A Change of Affection: A Gay Man’s Incredible Story of Redemption. Get your copy, online, at FamilyLifeToday.com; or call to order: 1-800-FL-TODAY. Again, our website: FamilyLifeToday.com; or order the book, A Change of Affection, when you call 1-800-358-6329—that’s 1-800-“F” as in family, “L” as in life, and then the word, “TODAY.”
You know, I love the opportunity we have here to wrestle with significant issues in our culture today/issues that have impact on marriages and on families. FamilyLife Today’s mission is to effectively develop godly marriages and families. We’re committed to providing practical biblical help and hope for marriages and families. We believe transformed families can change the world. They are so critical to the ongoing health of any culture/any civilization.
You, as a listener, help make that happen when, first of all, you tell other people about FamilyLife Today—maybe, pass on a link to the podcast that you’ve listened to today—and then, secondly, when you help support this ministry. The cost of producing and syndicating FamilyLife Today is a cost that is covered by friends of this ministry who donate so that FamilyLife Today can be heard by more people more often.
If you’re able to help with a donation today, we’d love to say, “Thank you for your support,” by sending you a copy of a new book I’ve written called Love Like You Mean It. It’s a book about marriage. We actually look at 1 Corinthians 13, the characteristics of love that are outlined there in Scripture, and talk about what a marriage would look like if husbands and wives were patient and kind, not self-seeking, not insisting on their own way—all of these character qualities apply to the marriage relationship—and that’s what we talk about in this book.
The book is our thank-you gift to you when you go online today to FamilyLifeToday.com to make a donation or call 1-800-FL-TODAY and donate over the phone. Thanks, in advance, for whatever you’re able to do to support this program. I hope you enjoy the book, Love Like You Mean It.
I also hope you can join us back, again, tomorrow when we’re going to talk with author and speaker, Shelby Abbott, about how we should respond when we’re wrestling with doubt.
Shelby: Instead of feeding your doubts and allowing your faith to starve, why don’t you feed you faith and allow your doubts to starve? It seems a little bit counterintuitive to think and feel that way; but it’s obviously the way that we should be going, putting the weight of our faith into Jesus during the process of the fact that we’re not sure that He’s going to prop us up.
Bob: We’ll talk about the right way to respond when we start to have questions about whether God exists, whether He loves us, whether His Word is true. We’ll talk about what we do, as parents, when our children are dealing with those kinds of doubts. I hope you can tune in for all of that.
I want to thank our engineer today, Keith Lynch, along with our entire broadcast production team. On behalf of our hosts, Dave and Ann Wilson, I’m Bob Lepine. We will see you back next time for another edition of FamilyLife Today.
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